Here's the latest version of my poster. I hand drew everything except for the type and scanned them in. I changed the page ornaments from a floral design to gears to tie it in closer to my theme. I wanted to convey a crude but clean look, a look that i associate with the industrial revolution. I also used more typefaces in the pile of text to add texture. I also changed the drawing of the man at the bottom right.
Here I filled up the empty space around the "industrial revolution" part and added detail to the hand drawn elements.
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Much improved. The corner motifs (I think we might call the rosettes, an architectural term) are good and fit with the other illustrations.
ReplyDeletePlaces that are weak:
- The spaces above and below "in the Industrial Revolution". Seems space and unfinished.
- The ribbon banner illustration. It does not match the subtley and sensitivity of your other drawings. Looks like a little kid drew it. The other drawings pay some heed to form and dimensionality. The repetition of lines and the visible intent of those lines gives them an understated and casual elegance. The ribbon looks sloppy.
- Vertical and horizontal rules as borders. Again too simple, like the ribbon. A think line down the center - not from end-to-end, but stops short of the end. Like an architectural detail. As you may have been noticing from your investigations of 19C prints, that much of the decoration comes from architectural forms.
Second one is an improvement. Much better. Richer and more compelling. Holds my interest with the emerging detail. I would continue t explore more possibilities in the details of the borders, train smoke and ribbon. The smoke over the ribbon is cluttered and busy now. A little sense of depth on the clouds would help move them above the visual plane of the ribbon. A little separation, exp. on the puff on the far left, would open up the space - it feels "glued on" and static.
ReplyDeleteGive a little breathing room between the bottom letter-pile and the bottom type. The type gets over powered and lost.
Is there any other text content for the poster? Even a brief quote that might reinforce your evocative illustration?